welcome to the world, baby

hmmm. i am in a funk today. i don't know what it is, but i'm feeling really off. does knowing that you're in a funk but not knowing what to do about it make it any less funk-ified? probably. it's at least a step in the right direction.

i'm really tired of winter and being cold all the time. i'm tired of hating 2 out of four classes and feeling apathetic about the other 2. i'm tired of trying to convince myself that i want to do homework and i want to study, but really, i don't. and i'm tired of sounding like a whiny 5 year old when i really need to grow the hell up.

i watched some of this new show called "quarterlife" and it was some of the most pretentious drivel i've heard in a long time. it was honestly quite terrible! the show revolved around a group of 25 year old people who collectively wallowed in their self-induced misery while subsequently wondering, "what does it all mean? what am i doing with my life? will i ever be happy/satisfied? etc etc etc."

fucking spare me.

i will not ever be like that. sure, i have off days (who doesn't) but i refuse to let my life be ruled by an emotion that could quite easily be quelled by simply removing your head from your butt. hey, i realize that you're confused/lonely/apathetic. so is everyone else. get over yourself. life is what it is, so just go with it, try to have a good time, and stop worrying so much about what's going to happen. trust me when i say this to you: everything will work itself out, one way or another. just go with it.

i'm still working on that last part myself. i realize that i worry about things that i probably don't need to and don't even want to think about things that i probably should be, but i'm working on it.

for example, just today i decided to stop bitching to myself about my weight issues and joined a website to help me count calories and stay on track to lose some pounds before summer. i don't think that i'm fat by any means, i'm just not where i want to be. and if i learn how to take care of myself now, it'll be easier to maintain in the future. no big.

switching subjects now... today in my philosophy class i got yelled at by my teacher...twice. he's kind of a self-righteous dude who doesn't like anyone even whispering while he's talking, or about to talk. he asks if anyone has any questions or comments a few times during his lecture, then interrupts students with his own opinions while they're talking and talks over them until they are forced to quit voicing their opinions. anyway, i was talking to a classmate before class today and didn't realize that he was wanting to start class. next thing i know everyone is staring at me and the prof says something along the lines of sarcastically asking if he may start class. that kinda ticked me off because i felt the way that he handled it was unnecessarily embarrassing. about half way through class, after i had written around two pages of notes on pretty much everything that comes out of his mouth, i glanced over at my friend's notebook and noticed that he had about two lines of notes. i laughed quietly to myself and when my friend asked what i was laughing about, i made a hand gesture that indicated he had a small amount of notes where i had a lot. my prof then called me out and was like, "do you have an observation that you'd like to share with the class? because if you do, we'd like to hear it. otherwise, i expect you to pay attention." i felt like a 3rd grader all over again. i realize that he has a short temper and doesn't want anyone fraternizing in class, but again, i don't exactly appreciate being called out in front of my entire class. it was just frustrating and humiliating. don't tell other people not to talk while you're talking but then talk over anyone else whom you "allow" to speak.

gah. i need a nap. sorry for the randomness.

my celebrity best friends

inspired by this post on pajiba, here's who i would hang out with and what we would do if i could choose any celebrity for a friend.

breakfast at an obscure-but-delicious diner with john cusack
bowling with the superbad boys
mix-tape making with quentin tarantino
sunning on the beach / deep talking with johnny depp
shopping with rachel bilson and grace kelly
putt putt golf and general hang out time with ellen page
baking and decorating cupcakes with justin timberlake
rock band / general jam session with brandon boyd
bar kareoke with zooey deschanel
paintball with heath ledger
going on a walk and talk with natalie portman
dinner and drinks with the ocean's 13 cast
sleepover with flight of the conchords (jermaine and brett!)
getting ice cream with the cast of i heart huckabees

other celebrities that would be cool to do anything with: phillip seymour hoffman, edward norton, joseph gordon-levitt, wes anderson, brendan fraiser, tim burton, helena bonham carter, kate winslet, jim carrey, patton oswalt, zach galifinakis, shia labeouf, simon pegg and nick frost, etc.

it could happen.